Thursday, March 25, 2010

Can, can, can you do the CCAN? ((No, not in the dirty, perverted way, thanks very much))

Shallow Hal is basically the movie if you wanna talk about comedic and thoughtless shallowness. And hey, it's pretty chill as a Chick Flick too.

Dear Diary, ((4:51 PM just got back home; or rather, not home, but to the new house my mom is making me live in despite my both literal and non-literal suffering. Kind if of like having to use a spoon to eat your angel hair pasta. It's bearable, but it sucks major buttocks. Ew, bad visual. Erase, erase! It just sucks in general, okay? ))


Mood(s): Confused as those people who reply, "The rainbow! Hehehehe!" to the question of what their favorite color is. Also I feel cynical and sarcastic. My way of dealing of stress. Well, that and screaming quietly into a pillow. Ice cream doesn't hurt either.

Song(s) of the day: The Middle by Jimmy Eat World and Live Like We're dying by Kris Allen. And what the heck, add in Taylor Swift's You Belong With Me for good measure.
Oh, and did you see The Princess and the Frog? (No I'm not asking if you have actually seen a princess and a frog cruising down the street in a bangin' low rider blasting out loud rap music surrounded by odd people with grills on their un-brushed teeth. Naturally, I mean the MOVIE.) There's a song called Never Knew I Needed by Ne-Yo that's off the chain, or as I like to say oh so lamely:
Off the shizniz! (Not to be confused with "on the shizniz" which means that's it's pretty good, but not great. Therefore, "OFF the shizniz" is pretty effin' great.)

Quote(s) of the Day: "Young men's love then lies Not truly in their hearts, but in their eyes." from the play Romeo and Juliet by non-other then the man known only as William Shakespeare, even though, yeah, there is some debate about the whole Shakespeare thingamabob.
This quote pretty much sums up high school guys.
Yet at the same time, aren't girls the same too? After all, a crush is just unrequited love unless the love is returned back and most of the time the guy you crush on isn't actually your best friend with a few pockmarks and skinny arms you've known as your best buddy half your life. The guy I like for instance. We have only spoken once. It was about what day it was. January something, I believe it was. Yet we have all of these little glances and eye contact with eachother constantly. I always find him somewhere near me in P.E. in a way that makes me think that maybe he's just trying to get my attention? If that's the case, he so succeeded in what he was aiming for.
But it is basically a shallow crush. It's about looks towards eachother. If he didn't have a cute face that reminded me of a teddy bear and cool Vans with awesome aqua coloring on it and if he didn't look like such a nice (Like THE most considerate guy I've ever seen from afar in my whole life) guy and didn't seem a little Class-Clownish (I can't help myself from liking a funny guy. I seriously can't.)...would I still be attracted to him?
My old 7th and 8th grade science teacher used to talk about how certain hormones in us just instantly attract certain people to eachother. Some kind of scent that makes us wanna passionately make out with a person. My question is why some people can resist the attraction by personality and stuff. Doesn't your body still yell, "Mayday! Wrong move!" and tell you to jump their bones, anyway?


First I'm gonna go and talk about something from last year, then some more interesting tibits from now. Btw, did you know that bumble bees have eyelashes? Just for the record.

Remember that one time where I talked about having
in my life?

I remember that day very well. 8th grade was just full of self-deprecation and trying to figure out who the h-e-double-hockey-sticks I really wanted to be.
HOW to be me.
It was so confusing to always be in the middle of everything all the time. I felt like if I didn't agree with the cool girls on everything then they might turn on me someday. But then I looked weak and unable to speak for myself.
Then again, that's what I was.
I remember going to the corner store near my old house that day and just wanting to buy some junk food and watch some Tyra Show at home.

Watching abused boyfriends being yelled at by pretty and tough girls while Tyra holds their hand and says, "We ARE going to get you help. Thanks for taking the first step," or watching Drag Queen moms admit their past rendezvous with other drag queens À la carte saying, "My child has NOTHING to do with this" as a doctor in the audience hired by Tyra tells them their wrongdoings; you can kind of forget your own faults and just think, oh dayum.
How can you NOT love Tyra for this?

As I made my way past the drink selection I glanced into the refrigerator thing to see if they had any special drinks that day like Fizzy Watermelon Bomb With New Monkey Ice Cream Added In! or anything new that would distract me from my actual miserableness.
And I stumbled upon a drink called
It was Vitamin Water of course, but I felt such a need for some balance in my life that I bought the beverage-falling into the cleverly marketed drink designed to trick gullible people like me into buying the product. After purchasing the over-priced flavored water I read the label.
I took it home and downed it. Not crazily of course. Last time I checked, I'm not mental. But I drank it and re-read the label. Anything to improve my life is cool with me.


I've been sorta off and on adding different details and stuff to this post the past three days and since it's now Spring Break (May I have a "Woot woot" and "Booyeahh"?) I have some time to share my thoughts, since you know, sharing IS caring. Unless of course, you're sharing AIDS or something similar in distaste which would actually be the opposite of caring.
But that's beside the point.


So, I've been doing a whole lotta thinkin' about CCAN. The weird thing about me liking him is that almost always when I like a guy it's because we talk a lot and have funny conversations and not very much at all about physical stuff. I never really liked a guy "from afar" I guess you could say. But this time it's different. I always wondered why girls in high school got major crushes on guys, I mean I didn't GET how you could like someone purely based on looks. It just seemed so Shallow Central, get off the Intellectual Train and walk through the Woods of Personality Traits and you'll find the place I'm talking about.
Yet at the same time, I somehow find myself right, smack-dab on the borderline of Shallow Central. After all, a big reason I like him is because from what I've seen he is extremely nice, considerate, and outgoing. He's also really funny and I love funny guys. So if I like his personality traits "from afar" does that still count as being shallow since I don't actually know him person-to-person?

Like the Tootsie Pop,
The World May Never Know.

-That Girl, going, going, gone head over heels. (Or rather, head over Vans)

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