Dear Diary, (I haven't used pink for my text color in a while, if you're wondering why this certain post is so powder-puff pink. I finally finished writing this one at 9"26 PM 4/22/10 on Thursday night. Project Runway is on in like half an hour, right? Uhm, may I please get a "WOOT WOOT"?)
Another crush down the toilet.
The non-literal and metaphorical toilet, that is. Although, the visual of an actual guy being flushed down the toilet is pretty funny. But that's beside the point. If I have a point that is. Maybe I'm just yankin' your chain (My new favorite saying. You can only take so many, "That's what she said," and "Your mom"'s before it gets old. Seriously dude, stop the madness!)
So. I mean, it's not like I got rejected or white-glove-slapped or caked with vanilla bean ice cream on the side. I'm just starting to feel the after effects of a newly non-existent crush. It sort of feels like being rejected while being white-glove-slapped with a piece of vanilla bean ice cream on the side, to be frank.
And you can be Paul.
You go a little loony when you get your crush broken. I've been having faux-ghetto smack-talk sessions with my friend over AIM and though she doesn't know it, it sort of like ranting for me. But in a different light. My favorite thing said was:
When he walks down the street...people are like...HEY koolaid!
because it has that stupid-pointless bickering thing about it I enjoy. Yes, very much so. And along with the ghetto smack-talking we have decided that we both have "Ghetto, fanciful, bad, dr. Seuss vocabularies."
Oh the places you'll go.
Anyway. I'm pretty upset about not having a crush anymore. You might ask me what was wrong with SSAS.
What was wrong with SSAS, That Girl?
Oh, well since you asked...
I barely see him. He's a sophomore and I'm just a lowly freshman.
Woot, I'm so pro with self-loathing by now.
But, obviously I don't really mean that.
I just wish we talked more. And we don't.
After school we used to hang. As a group that is. EXBFF, SSAF, me, and some other people would head down to the smoothie shop or "Happy Yogurt!" place near school to catch up.
But I haven't hung out with EXBFF or SSAF in a while.
ExBestFriend hasn't invited me to lunch in about a week or 2, and she just says "hi" when we pass each other at lunch.
I mean, sure, the beyotches I hang out with at lunch can be pretty funny sometimes and they would never diss me seriously. But it's just different.
Things keep changing and I don't quite know how to keep up.
Don't take me wrong though. Of course I appreciate being one of said "cool" kids.
But it's way overrated.
Which bugs the hell out of me.
Why can't people just be themselves? Fronts are not cool.
Not to be confused to "fonts," which are obviously cool.
-egotistical football player voice- DURR!
Btw, I've always slightly disliked the word "egotistical." Because it sounds strangely similar to the a word known as "testicle."
Just thought I'd put in my two cents. (NO, not two cents into a "testicle"! Into the blog post. Oh man, get your head outta the gutter! It's dirty. Put it in a cold shower instead. Those aren't thought of as dirty. Taking a hot shower might be a little provocative though...
well, like I said: cold shower!)
And that's about it for SSAF. Sure, I still wanna be friends with him and luckily he has absolutely no idea in his head that I ever had feelings for him, so it's all good. -Long sigh-
Enough self-loathing for now, though! If anything, I should self-loofah right now. By that, I mean I should go take a shower (therefore use a loofah! get it? self-loath=self-loofah? whooh, that's pretty PUNNY!) if I don't want my hair to go berserk on me tomorrow.
But first I have a thing or two to say.
So. I wanted to about books and though that sounds really boring (i.e. 7th grade English teacher paraphrase, "And that's a conjunction in this line of pros.") I still wanna talk about it. There are seriously some things irking me about teen fiction-novels these days! I actually started typing up a post about it the other day, but I didn't have the time to finish it so I saved it on a note on my laptop's desktop.
Here's what I started talking about:
Books. Just my take on the young adult books published out there lately. I do read a lot, if you didn't assume that by now. That's right, That Girl is a makeup-wearing, Super Smash Bros. playing, bookworming, blogging, middle-class beezy.
Only, not the "beezy" part. I was just running out of adjectives.
Young Adult fiction books have portrayals with too many direct, "inspiring," words at the end of each story and overwhelmingly exaggerated character group stereotypes like goths. That's basically what I wanted to say in a nutshell.
There are a whole lotta books I read with a good plot and good dialog, but sometimes they're ruined by an author who wanted to literally tell you what their message behind the story is.
Which really doesn't make any sense. The whole point of an author's message is to read behind the lines the author wrote, but if the lines themselves give away the answer, it's like telling the reader that they wouldn't be smart enough to figure it out just by reading it. In my opinion, if the reader doesn't get your book just by depth of the pros...the author has failed. Deliberately pointing out the message of the book in pros is like saying that they couldn't figure out how to put their message in the book behind the lines and so they took the easy way out by saying, "You should never do ____ or ____ because ____ ."
Although, one of my newly-favorite books has a literal author's message at the end of the book. It's different though, because it's not a character contemplating something in their head, it's the character writing in a diary, which is so much better of course.
Isn't that right, Diary? Buddy ol' pal? Chum? Oh yeahh.
Anyway. The book is:
Happyface by Stephen Emond.
I've only read it once because it's pretty deep and it's not exactly a light-hearted read, but his sense of humor is right on point and some of the story is really funny. Since it's written in diary form, I'm glad that it really stays true to how a teenage boy's head would really be at. It's not an exaggerated portrayal of a teenager, which I like a lot. It's also not toned down to fit the mold of how the stereotypical acts or made to be a light-hearted read when the story itself is kind of moving in a way.
On the other hand, I read another story:
Heaven Looks a Lot Like the Mall by Wendy Mass
which I felt was a teensy bit...full of B.S. I could be wrong though. Maybe some people felt like the story was actually heartfelt. A novel's interpretations are very subjective, after all.
I mean, some of it was kind of funny and the storyline was really interesting, but I felt like the whole story was a literal author's message and at the end of the story the character goes into her speech to herself on how to act for the rest of her life.
I just felt like even though you are given facts and quotes from the character's life, you don't really know the real her.
You know what she did in preschool and early high school years, but my question is who she really was. It wasn't personalized enough to tell the truth. Kind of like a biography with "food for thought" at the end. Like when I B.S. "food for thought" at the end of all my essays for English classes. I just get a feeling.
AGAIN though, I could be completely off the mark. Like playing darts in the living room and throwing your dart at the cat Fluffypokins in the kitchen instead, off.
That's pretty much what I wanted to say...
And in Happyface, the main character has to write journal entries in his English class and I found his journal entries incredibly insightful and HI-larious. I loved the entry about his family which includes his parents, brother, him, and his "half-brother" who is a Martian; and the other one about writing in a journal after writing in a journal to be a repetitive and how writing in general is not only repetitive since your're writing about life which you've already experienced, but also a little bit boastful.
But I don't want to give too much away.
It's a great book. The art and comics in the book are really cool too; the comics made me literally laugh-out-loud sometimes. Get the book and read it!
There's only one more thing I wanna say and then I'm going sign off so I can watch Back to The Future 3 on my old VCR, I recently saw the first Back to The Future and it was really great. Why can't movies be that great anymore?
So. LBB has a girlfriend.
I'm so happy! My guy friend finally got a girl to say yes.
Can you say "Hallelujah" and then do a lame happy dance for me?
I don't have to worry about our close-friend relationship anymore. We get to stay friends and this I'm happy about. The only thing, is that I feel bad for him. His jerky guy friends on the baseball team keep telling him that he can "do better" then the girl he's with. And he confided in me that he really likes her. Due to the fact that he's had a crush on 4 different girls this year and that he's been rejected 3 out of the 3 times he asked a girl out; he'd be way pushing his luck to try and get someone "better."
I personally think that thought the girl is not the prettiest girl out there, ("I think she's really, really cute," said from one of the beyotches I eat lunch with.) she's pretty darn tootin' pretty.
You catch my drift?
She's obviously not hot. She's as short as me, but a little less curvy (that's somehow possible with my stick-looking figure and all. go figure.) and not very popular. She's also shy according to LightBrightBarney.
I hope people stop judging him and her and that they make it work out well.
The other day when we were having a heart-to-heart talk about his (first!) relationship. He's a sweet guy really. I told him that I keep trying to match my friends up and get them together even though I suck at it, and he just comforted me by saying that my heart was in the right place.
Oh and today at lunch he kept walking by me while I was having lunch with the beyotches-who, I know for a fact, are constantly gossiping about eachother behind one anothers' backs by the way-and talking to me about things. Like, his friends were debatin' whether or not you can drink something and walk at the same time. I could but LBB choked and so did his friends. It was actually pretty entertaining.
I liked that he didn't really talk to the beyotches, but that he was talking to me. It was nice to know that you don't have to be a beyotch to have guys like you, you know? The underdog prevails! Until they turn on me or something. That wold suck. I'd have to take one of those super-pills from under a ring on my hand to fight back.
I'm making an Underdog cartoon reference, for the record, I'm not making a getting-high-on-pills reference.
In the words of Forrest Gump: That's all I have to say about that.
-That Girl, debating the literal level of the song As Long As You Love Me by the Backstreet Boys.
(They say, "I don't care who you are. Where you're from. What you did. As long as you love me.Who you are. Where you're from. Don't care what you did. As long as you love me..." So does that mean it doesn't matter at all who you are as long as you love one of the Boys? I don't understand. You can be a cannibal with 4 eyes and a longing to eat squid raw for dinner every night with opposable thumbs for every finger in addition to 8 Nobel Peace Prizes...and none of it matters? As long as "you love me"? I know being shallow is bad. But really?)
Mood(s): Tired, but pretty good overall. I'm not feeling so bad about the crush break anymore. Yep, I'm actually in a good mood today. Decent, at least. Well, I'm not being cynical, okay? That's a start.
Song(s) of the Day: "Baby" by Justin Bieber, "My L.O.V.E" by The League, and "Nothin' on You" by B.O.B. Because they all make single girls feel like in actuality, there's a guy out there who seriously thinks you ARE the one for them. What rock are these guys hiding under?
Oh, and "Two Princes" by the Spin Doctors (Who are awesome!) and FUN.'s song "Walking the Dog" is my absolute favorite right now (I could listen to it all day. The beats are great.)
Oh gosh, add Jimmy Eat World's "Always Be" too. I'm listening to it now and it's pretty effin' great. Love Jimmy Eat World!
Quote(s) of the Day: Charlie Brown, "There must be millions of people all over the world who never got any love letters...I could be their leader." and because Charlie Brown has the best quotes ever, here's another one by him, "Nothing takes the taste out of peanut brittle quite like unrequited love."