Monday, April 14, 2014

There's Your Dream Person... Then There's The Person You're Dating

Dear Diary,

Man, it's been a hell of a long time since I've taken the time to write a post on here. There are some reasons for this, and so, I shall list them:

-I've got a boyfriend
 o we aren't miserably unhappy with each other
 o he takes up a hell of a lot of my free time (see: "AllofThatGirl'sTime")
 o unhappy relationships make for interesting posts while happy ones bore the shit out of most readers (Okay, just me? I mean...let's be honest, sadness makes for art while happiness makes for puff-pastry-pieces)

-I'm taking a full school load of courses
 o fuck this homework I have to still do tonight (It's been bugging me how long I have gone without writing anything that I actually feel free writing about!)

-I have a new car
 o fuck car payments

-I have to work a decent amount of hours every week
 o see: "I have a new car"


So, the only interesting reason listed above is really the first one.
A boyfriend?!!
And no, it's not the ExFriendWithBenefits.

NO, it's not the guy I went to the dance with in high school. But while I'm on that subject...

I've been so stuck on describing life exploding with emotions when I had EXFWB around that I completely forgot to describe a majorly cool, romance-novel-like event that occurred about 6 months ago!
There's that one guy I described as being the perfect guy, the one I went to a dance with my sophomore year in high school (that was 4 years ago?) and became infatuated with after it didn't work out between us. Last summer I started taking summer classes at the community college that he is currently attending, fully aware that I could run into him at any time-kind of hoping we'd run into each other in a cutesy not creepy way, but I was honestly actually at the school to study as my priority and not expecting anything to come of him and I anymore-and something crazy happened.
I was in the food court after standing in line to pick up a cup of mah Starbucks Chai Latte and saw a really cute guy from a distance, walking towards me. We were walking in opposite directions and for some reason, just as when I first met that guy I was infatuated with, I couldn't help but to check this guy out and even felt like smiling when he got closer to me and that is not something I ever do when I pass a dude. Then he started looking familiar...
We were looking at each other with wide eyes as we met one another halfway, near the front doors of the building, and took on awkward grins. He probably thought I'd ignore him and continued walking past me slightly while maintaining eye contact, but for some reason I said, "Hey" really casually and kept my cool as he turned to face me.
"What the fu-" he started to say while smiling.
I just looked at him with a big smile on my face.
"What are you...what the-" he scrambled to find his words while we stood smiling at each other some more.
"What are you doing here?" he finally got out.
"I go to school here." I said pleasantly and while still grinning ear from ear.
His smile is electric and so was our chemistry just from standing across from each other. 4 years later and we still had some kind of spark!  
"Wha-?" He was looking at me with disbelief, but somehow the surprising spark being present in the awkwardness of our meeting another like this was...serendipity? Meeting at a single building in a school away from our home cities at this time in the morning when we both are not morning people...what were the odds?
From there, we had a short conversation with him mostly scrambling to ask me questions while I answered them and couldn't help showing all my teeth, feeling way more in control, confident, and delighted in the situation then previous times we had ran into each other when we were both with our groups of friends a few years earlier. Man, did he look good. Biker legs, my homie!
At some point I cut our meeting short by saying, "I guess I'll see you around," with a straight face and sweet, ever so might-be-flirting-but-could-have-imagined-it voice. It was the kind of flirting I do instinctually when feeling confident and honestly could not plan out in advance if I wanted to. Knowing that he was still staring at me, I walked away without turning to see if he was still there, and I could feel his gaze following me as I disappeared from sight. Just kidding. I sat down at a table by myself on the other side of the food court to text a few of my friends what had happened and took out my notebook to study a bit before class.
That's the stuff of fairytales, Drew Barrymore movies, and chick-lit novels. But it was all true and amazing! Even thinking about it now, with a different boyfriend who is very nice and good to me, my heart flutters a bit at the thought of the two of us running into each other the way we did. The surprise! The undeniable chemistry that I know we both felt!  
How do I know he felt something too? He texted me. For the first time in 4 years.
And we texted for a day before stopping.
Then he texted a week or two later and we talked for over a day.
Another two weeks pass and he texts me and we talk for about the same amount of time.
This goes on for a while, until we start talking for a few days at a time. No "good night," "good morning" kind of stuff, but he checked up on how I was doing all the time. Gave me advice on teachers without me asking, told me when to leave my house to avoid traffic the first day of school in the fall, and even indirectly asked me to go to a movie night the campus was having for extra credit in our separate classes, twice.  
He was my dream guy, but I realized the more we talked that I still didn't know him any better now than I did at 16. The jokes and kindness were still amazing, but everything he said was always impressive and I wondered how he always knew the right thing to say. Then again, maybe he really isn't a very flawed guy. Either way, my infatuation faded quite a bit and now I still see him as a great guy and I think any girl he ends up with will be so very lucky. I have only spoken praises about him and everybody whose known me for a few years knows that, and he has always always always been a gentleman to me despite us not working out romantically. Could there still be a future for us? We'd have to wait and see where life takes us, I suppose. I got lots of compliments from him in the past half year over text and I've never felt offended by anything by him before, which further pushes me to believe he is a great guy.
But I have a boyfriend. And the two of them had a class together before. Like, 2 months ago before now.
At the second movie night I attended, I went with...
dun.  dun.  dun.
EXFWB's friend (I call him *Paul) that I had been hanging out with previously. Look at my last post for more details about that. And he is the guy I am now dating.
Here's what was awkward about that night though:
I went with Paul to the movie night so we wouldn't be going stag and I knew that ExInfatuation (Honestly, he's only getting hotter every year though!! cute teenager = fine lookin' man) was going to be there because he texted me earlier that day about it. At this point with EXI though, I was a feeling over the whole "I'm going to impress him!" phase and more about getting to know Paul better.
At some point, EXI's friend-who is my best friend's cousin-says, "THAT GIRL? Is that you?" and I walk over to the two of them with their other guy friend. Paul follows besides me and the FIVE of us stand in a circle as I talk to my best friend's cousin and make an awkward (not good-awkward) pass of words between EXI. He is standing across from me in this mini circle and these guys are all pretty much towering above my small frame, making it just feel weird.
"How did you like ---?" EXI says a word I'm not sure of.
"How did I like what?" I respond. The room is loud and full of students, so I'm forced to raise my voice.
"How did you like (phil)?" It sounds like he's asking me how I like my philosophy class?
"Phil?" I half-shout back.
"(Phil)!" He half-shouts towards me.
"Phil?" I ask.
"...phil...?" I am obviously losing in the art of communication. I'm kind of grinning and so is everybody else, but not in the best ha-ha way. More like a grimace on my part actually.
"Film!" He says again, leaning back when saying it this time.
"Oh! Film! It was good." Well, I wasted everybody's time with a response that has no real grain to it.
"Did you like it?" I ask him.
"Yeah, [I forgot what he said after this but it was something suiting to my own answer]."
"Okay. Well, see you guys around," I say and they say bye to me.
Paul, who said nothing but stood next to me the whole time, followed behind me. I think the main reason it was awkward was because of the obvious question in the air of who this guy was and why I was with him one-on-one this night, me not knowing what to introduce each person as to each other in relationship to me and only me knowing 3/4 of them.
What was I supposed to say?
"Hello, this is Paul. He is somebody I am starting to become friends with. Paul, this is the guy I used to date and I am also starting to become friends with EXI. Paul, this is my best friend's cousin. I don't know that other guy."  That wouldn't work.

Anyway. If you skip ahead a month later, 1/10/14, Paul and I are officially dating.

... Whoops, looks like I've procrastinated my homework and sleep longer than I planned.

Stay tuned to catch up with me about my improving love life: i.e. no longer used for slick booty calls!
Ew. Slick booty. I meant, like...sketchy...or some other word...not slick booty...

-That Girl, I also need to revamp my writing skills(skillz)!